By Thea Jarvis

For Cynthia Johnson, the evening began with the “jitters.” Getting ready for church, she found herself shaking as she placed a spray of baby’s breath in her hair and watched her husband, W.T., nervously don a black jacket and tie. The Johnson children, Marc, 11, Kimberly, eight, and Brandy, three, were hopping with excitement, in spite of their spit-polished shoes and Sunday clothes.

It was Valentine’s weekend and their parents were on their way to the altar.

Joined by nine other couples whose marriages had never been blessed by the Catholic Church, the Johnsons sat in the front pew of St. John the Evangelist Church in Hapeville, happy participants in a sacramental ceremony that would enhance and deepen their 12-year marriage.

“It was almost like I had never been married before,” laughed Cynthia after she and W.T. had stood before the congregation, recited promises of fidelity and received the blessing of the Church. “It gave a sort of new meaning to our marriage.”

Father Michael Woods, pastor of St. John’s and initiator of the event, echoed Cynthia’s thoughts. “These couples weren’t just renewing their vows,” he explained. “this was the actual sacrament of marriage as recognized by the Church.”

Father Woods’ awareness of the need for such a ceremony grew out of the monthly baptismal class offered at St. John’s. After interviewing new parents in January, he realized many had been married outside the Church.

“It struck a chord in me,” he remembers. The couples were sensitive to their faith but for a variety of reasons had deferred having their marriage convalidated by the Church. It was clear to him that “they felt the pain of exclusion.”

A self-described “activist,” with the look of the leprechaun about him, Father Woods began reunion plans immediately. With encouragement from the parish staff, he set aside the vigil Mass of February 13 as an opportunity to celebrate the sacrament of matrimony. A notice in the parish bulletin, run for four weeks, announced the date and listed conditions for participation: couples had to have been married civilly or in another church and have been married at least two years; they were now doing their best to practice their faith in a limited way; there were currently no obstacles to having their marriage blessed by the Church, (e.g., need for annullment).

During the month of January, Sunday Masses included homilies that targeted the spirituality of relationships – childhood bondings, teenage dating, engagement, marriage, and the place of the divorced and separated within the Church. An evening of catechesis on the sacrament of marriage, entitled “Why Have Our Marriage Blessed in the Church When Our Marriage Has Been Blessed in So Many Ways Already?” fleshed out the specifics of what it meant to be witnesses to Christ’s love as married people. On that occasion, Father Woods discussed necessary paperwork, helped couples fill out forms for the archdiocesan Marriage Tribunal, and answered the question posed by the topic for the evening.

At the beginning of most marriages, he explained, couples focus more on each other than on the community. Sacramental marriage, however, broadens the scope and vision of the spouses. It means they are committed to living as witnesses to the love of Christ, that they will open themselves to others in His name. Some couples waited a lifetime for such a blessing.

Olga and Noble Walker have been married for 39 years. All three of their children were raised as Catholics and Olga has continued to attend Mass all her life. But because her non-Catholic husband had been married before, she could not participate in the sacramental life of the church. “I didn’t feel complete,” she admits.

The Walkers’ February 13 marriage was, for Olga, ‘the biggest day in my whole life. I’ve been looking forward to it for such a long time.” The quiet evening in Hapeville was “the first time we have been offered the opportunity” to have their marriage blessed and accepted by the Church. A hushed congregation at St. John’s was noticeably touched by the Walkers’ exchange of vows, marked by deep emotion and the friendship that long life brings to a marriage.

“The whole idea was excellent,” Noble Walker reflected. “The way it was handled was excellent.”

For Carl and Helen Rutherford, the journey to the altar was no less meaningful. Married 25 years ago before a justice of the peace in South Carolina, Carl found the civil rite a far cry from the familiar sacramental rituals he had experienced in New York City parochial schools and churches. But the difficulties involved in marrying a non-Catholic turned Carl away from a Church that didn’t seem to have the answers he and Helen were looking for. The celebration at St. John’s signified Carl’s reconciliation with the Church of his youth as well as the convalidation of his marriage.

“I’ve seen the Church change an awful lot,” smiles Carl. “The warmth and support – I’ve enjoyed it.”

Father Woods was edified by people’s responses to the ceremony that was, for him, “not just another program, but a prompting that led its own self.” He was particularly moved by the longing people had to again be part of the Church community.

“They truly looked forward to being back in the sacramental life of the Church. They really missed it, being away, and wanted to so much to receive Eucharist.” It was, moreover, a celebration of family, of parents, children, witnesses and parish friends.

The wide parish support couples received and the warmth of the welcome accorded them reflects the “strong awareness at St. John’s of the Catholic experience of faith,” Father Woods observed. Noting the wedding feast served in the parish hall after the ceremony, he pointed out that “it wasn’t piecemeal or finger foods, but a killing of the fatted calf – a welcome home.”

Does the parish plan an encore next year? Most certainly.

“This year was crowded, but not ‘fast food’ stuff,” said Father Woods. “There was a lovely atmosphere among the couples.” Next time around he hopes to expand the marriage catechesis to two evenings and perhaps involve some of this year’s “newly marrieds” in sharing their experience with others.

“What struck me was the tremendous love these non-Catholic spouses had for their Catholic spouses to go through with this,” Father Woods continued to marvel. “They were so accepting of their need. It was a great expression of love.”