By Sherry Dolan

(Sherry Dolan, a senior at St. Pius X High School, is a member of the Directors Committee of the Pastoral Ministry team at the school.)

When I was younger I didn't understand why at this time of year I saw darker colors on the altar, heard people say, "What are you giving up for Lent?" and "I hate fish!"

I can remember my Dad being angry with my brother one Friday. He had just finished a hamburger as my father walked in. As you can imagine, my Dad got angry -- very angry! I didn't see what was so terrible. My father explained quite clearly and distinctly, as he always does, about Lent, fish, the "rules", etc. I still thought he overreacted -- I mean, what's a little hamburger? I just didn't buy it!

I don't think it became quite clear to me until he was in the middle of sermon 243 days later. He sat in the chair as he has so many times before, with us all gathered around -- rather reluctantly! "It's the little things," he began, going on about how we could help around the house, and make a special effort to get along with each other. But you could say I "tuned him out." I thought back to a few days before in the kitchen when I saw my father's face fill with anger. I see, I thought. It wasn't so much the act of eating meat but rather the thought -- or rather the lack of thought -- "the little thing."

Not to have eaten the meat would have been to deny oneself something. It would have been a visible sign of love to someone whom you can't quite hug or give a smile to. As I got a little older I looked at Lent as my brother had only a few years before. It was a time to go to special Masses, eat fish and finally, end with Easter Mass.

Now I think of it with so much more meaning. It has become a time where it is what you put into it. It is a time to prepare and anticipate. Lent is a special time set aside to prepare for Easter. In many ways it is a chance not so much to reach out as it is to look within. During my first explanations of Lent I was told, "During Lent you should pray, fast and use voluntary self-discipline." Voluntary self-discipline -- I figured Lent was going to be on my "most dreaded" list, but I was wrong!

It can be kind of scary to take a hard look inside of yourself instead of studying something concrete. At least there, you can put some distance between you and the subject. The past three Lents I have not always been happy with what I found in myself, but the "little things," as my father said, really helped to make up for the times I had failed. By trying to better myself through sacrifice and the little put forth I truly sense that God becomes so much more real in my life and Easter truly becomes an exciting time.

St. Pius X High School has a great deal to do with the growth of young people's faith. Religion can be simply ritual if you let it, but when I entered St. Pius that really changed for me. At Pius there is a genuine Christian atmosphere -- not just when "the teachers are looking" but among the students.

During Lent, it's really nice to know someone beside yourself is doing a little "soul searching" and exercising a little voluntary self-discipline. When you can look not only at your elders but your own friends to show you what the spirit of Lent really is by a word, an action, or just a caring smile, it makes you feel there is something worthwhile in it all.

That feeling can be contagious. For example, not all the students at Pius are Catholic, but some of those who are not must see and feel an intangible spirit that exists within our faith.

Consequently, some are studying to enter the Church. Shea Aiken, a senior at St. Pius studying to be a Catholic, describes Lent as "the time when we recognize how the poor and hungry are suffering. As Catholics this months is to preserve our salvation and to realize just how fortunate we are.'

Amanda Canahl, also a senior, says it "is a time to reflect and renew our commitments and beliefs in God in our life."

Lent may be different things to different people, but one thing is sure -- Christ is alive and present in our lives if we are open to him. The power of his spirit is at work daily, but during the season of Lent we have a special opportunity to listen more carefully, watch more closely and feel more deeply the power of his love that is with us in all seasons.