Love is the most important need which seeks satisfaction in marriage and it leads to honesty, responsibility, flexibility and adaptability, Father James F. Scherer, director of Catholic Social Services said Monday night in his final talk on family life.

“Only when a marriage represents mutual love and a deep craving for each other’s company is it properly and adequately motivated. Love should also include a firm conviction of mutual marital faithfulness. No marriage can be firmly established which is not based on mutual trust.”

Father Scherer said a second need is security. “Lack of security is more disturbing in women than in men. This is because women have more at stake in marriage while man is more independent. He has a job, greater freedom of movement and it not tied down by care of children.”

The priest said self-esteem is also important because a person expects praise for his or efforts. “Sarcasm and unwarranted criticism, better known as ‘nagging,’ are like malignant tumors gnawing away at the vitals of marriage.”

Other points covered in his talk include:

Creativity—The need to create is much sinned against in marriage and is a very secret source of frustration. In an adjusted and healthy marriage sexual needs are satisfied with due regard for their proper place in the hierarchy of procreation.

Acceptance of Authority: “The man must accept the responsibility for the discipline of the family. No dominating woman is happy. The husband and wife cannot exert equal authority. There can only be one head in the society called family.”

Gregariousness: “This is frequently sinned against. The mother, for example, who works so hard for the children that she has no energy left to play with them is not wise.”